Many people write to me and ask me how they can use the law of attraction to manifest their ideal love partner. Many have been hurt in past relationships and do not want to re-create the same pain with a new partner. Until I successfully manifested MY dream partner, I had no idea that there was a critical step in the manifestation process that I had been missing for years.
The fundamental step in taking advantage of the law of attraction is called many things, but for today, I call it Establishment of intentions. To manifest your dream partner, you must first write (yes, you should write it down) a laundry list (or “wish list”) of qualities and characteristics that would best describe your ideal partner. Now here’s the catch: you need to write things that are CLEAR and SPECIFIC.
It’s okay to include traits like honesty and integrity. But also include things that are more specific. For example, when I was manifesting my dream partner, James, my laundry list looked like this:
– precious
– 5 feet 8 inches to 5 feet 10 inches tall (great to be my figure skating partner)
– athletic and fun
– able to skate as well as me
– we look fantastic on the ice together
– affectionate – likes to hug and kiss a lot
– likes to massage
– he likes to cook (since I didn’t like to cook)
– useful around the house (likes to cut firewood)
– enjoy taking care of me
– spiritual
– enjoy personal growth
– likes to go to personal growth workshops
do yoga with me
– he likes children and would be a great father
– I have to move here since I don’t want to move
Do you see how specific I was in many ways? It took me months to get more and more specific as I learned from each relationship I was involved in in the meantime. And guess what? I have everything I asked!
Here is the other thing you need to know. When you’re building your laundry list and can’t decide what you want, it can help you remember what didn’t work out in past relationships, and then ask for the opposite. For example, if your former lover was a bad listener, ask for a patient listener on your ideal partner. I do not want you to do it focus what you don’t want because the law of attraction states that what you focus on grows. However, recognizing what you don’t want can sometimes be a stepping stone to being clear about what you do want. make want.
The mistake many people make when lusting after their ideal partner is being too lazy. The reason people are lazy is often because they don’t believe that what they can actually manifest is what they REALLY want. That happened to me when I first tried to manifest my dream partner. You both wanted a figure skating partner and a love partner, but you didn’t think you could have both in one person. Why? Because I knew almost every man in figure skating who could skate in pairs and none of them were appropriate. But one night, I had an intuitive “hit” that I needed to ask for what I REALLY wanted, not what I thought I could get.
Therefore, I changed my list to the one you see above. Not long after, James and I met. It has been a divine union ever since!
YOU CAN have everything you ask for. You must know yourself well to be clear about what you want. So guess what? All the qualities or traits that the partner of your dreams have (honesty, integrity, courage, independence, etc.) must also be resonating within you. Why? Because the law of attraction states that “the similar attracts the similar”, so you cannot attract someone with qualities that you do not have.
Just to reiterate: the first step in taking advantage of the Law of Attraction is to make your “wish list” in as much detail as possible. Don’t worry about HOW your dream partner is going to manifest. The “hows” are in the domain of the Universe. By the way, The Universe found my ideal partner who was not even a figure skater, but an aggressive inline skater! James is now an amazing pairs skater and we won a national gold medal in our first competition together! Do you see how creative the Universe can be?
Make your list and refine it as you learn more about yourself. One of my colleagues, Sandi Sain, who is a relationship and sex therapist, went on 500 dates before finalizing her “wish list.” You can listen to the interview with Sandi Sain in my program Blog Talk Radio …
When you’ve accomplished the first step in manifesting your dream partner, stay tuned! Because soon you will receive messages from the Universe that the couple of your dreams is on the right track!