Self-gratitude is the ability to appreciate oneself without the benefit of outside influence, and it is a very difficult thing for most people to do, but it is certainly the most powerful thing any of us can learn to do.
There are so many different tools and systems for success that you could get confused if you spent too much time looking at all the options. However, there is a single unifying thread that makes any or all tools and systems work, or not work, for the user. Every tool and system is based on how the user feels about himself. Gratitude in any form is a powerful attitude that will generate results; however, gratitude towards oneself is a powerful tool that can change all things. It is the key to personal success, whatever it means to you.
Many of us pick up where our parents left off with a practice of beating ourselves up whenever we perform below what we perceive to be our best or beyond our ability. In many cases, we have set ourselves up expecting the impossible that we cannot deliver, and then beat ourselves up for not being able to deliver on our expectations. For those of us who do that, we have left little to no leeway.
The interesting thing about that little game with ourselves is that, like our parents, we would never reward ourselves for poor performance. Having a successful business that offers freedom and flexibility is such a great reward – it would feel like our parents actually bought us that new Porch for our 18th birthday. so big.
There is hope in the powerful tool called self-appreciation or self-appreciation; it’s just a matter of learning how to use it and applying it as consistently as possible. Here’s the problem: Often people dive into this idea and try to realize it perfectly, which is nearly impossible at best, no matter how young they’re just starting out, letting their ‘not good enough’ thinking get the better of them. drive them back to the ‘beat ’em selfs up’ game.
It’s time to say to ourselves, ‘enough is enough!’ It’s time to break that self-destructive cycle that breaks our hearts and prevents us from grasping the gold ring, which is, in all respects, our birthright. What that means is that learning to practice self-appreciation requires that we start appreciating ourselves when we are least satisfied with our accomplishments, as well as when we are satisfied. It’s time to get our backs off!!
But how do you get there?
Most of us are used to making a to-do list, so that might be the easiest place to start. How about starting a list of ‘facts’? I’ve been using to-do lists for a number of years, and my experience is that a to-do list helps me appreciate myself by giving me a visual way to acknowledge everything I do. This will be particularly useful for women who are taking care of the home and, at the same time, trying to build a business.
Your to-do list should include everything on your to-do list, every chore you do, every phone call you make, every errand you run, and everything you do for yourself, too. In fact, that last piece, what he has done for himself, may be the most important part of the list. We’ll come back to that part in a minute, but first let’s look at the housework.
When I said ALL household chores, I meant exactly that. If you pick up some clothes off the floor, let the dog in or take the mail; all this must be taken into account because each action takes time out of your day and if you have a full day to handle little things that are not on the list, you run the risk of thinking that you wasted your day. This list of facts is an important snapshot of what you accomplish that will help you recognize that you do a lot and therefore there is a lot to appreciate about yourself.
There are a few reasons to list everything you do for yourself and the most important one is: You are the most important person in your life. If you don’t recognize the things you do for yourself as important, you are discounting the value of yourself and definitely not in a position of self-worth. If you find that at the end of most days there is nothing on your list to take care of yourself, then it’s time to get into your day. That may seem difficult at first, but it’s worth the effort.
Always start by appreciating what is. If you took a shower, put it on your list and appreciate yourself for doing something for yourself. Did you read something you love? That goes on your list too and don’t forget to appreciate yourself for doing something for you! The time spent doing for yourself is the most important moment of your day. Let’s face it, if you don’t take care of yourself, you have less energy to take care of others and your business. Take the time you need to recharge and let the gratitude you feel for yourself spill over into the other things you do and the people you do it for.
You will find that as time goes by, your to-do list will get longer and longer. There are a couple of magical things that happen when you appreciate what you really do. First, you will find that you get better at the things you do, which will make them faster to do and therefore less time consuming. Second, you’ll find that you have more time in your day to get things done. As for why that happens, well that’s another multi-page article so I won’t explain it, however I promise you if you’re diligent over time these things will happen.
Another useful tool is the self-assessment list. It’s a simple thing to do and can change your life faster than most other things. Take 5 minutes at the beginning and end of your day and write down 10 things you appreciate about yourself. They can be things like ‘I’m brilliant’, ‘I’m an amazing father’, ‘I’m love’, actions you’ve taken like ‘I helped an old lady with her shopping today’, ‘I smiled at the cashier’, ‘I helped my son with your homework’, skills you have like ‘I’m a great cook’, ‘I love making birdhouses’, ‘I’m a wonderful networker’ or anything else you want. you may think it shows how special and wonderful you are – to yourself.
No one else will see your lists, so go crazy, crazy and shine so you can see your magnificence. I personally applied this method for almost 3 years and the transformation has been glorious, permanent and life changing. I became my own power tool.
Arrogance vs Appreciation
Many clients beginning this journey worry that they will appear arrogant or self-important as they move further toward appreciating themselves. Nothing can be further from the truth. People who seem arrogant or conceited are not in a position to appreciate themselves; instead, they are doing and saying things with the intention of being appreciated by others to fill the void they feel because they don’t appreciate themselves.
Arrogance is an outward journey of someone who believes that what they need and want is outside of themselves. Self-appreciation is an inner journey that will help you let your light shine into the world around you, making you more attractive, more magnetic, more effective, and most importantly, more of who you really are.
Have you ever met someone who everyone liked, who built massive downlines with little effort and everything he touched seemed to turn to gold? That someone his kids can’t wait to see, always has a smile for everyone, is helpful at all times, and always seems to make any gathering even better? Have you ever wished you were more like that person?
There is a common thread for every person who fits that description: they appreciate themselves, whether they know it or not. They are their own power tool!
The good news is that you can be that too, and it’s just a habit of appreciating yourself until you’re your own power tool!
Good work!!