What exactly is charisma? Most would agree that it is a magical, illusory personal quality, divinely endowed in some people more than others. One thing is for sure, it is more easily identified than it is defined. It is the secret to liking and agreeing with others. It is the highly sought after quality that makes people envy others due to their sympathy and ease with which they interact with people. Charisma, like many other character traits, may be more gifted for some, but regardless of your given level, charisma, like any other skill, can be further developed.
It is officially defined as “an unusual ability to influence people and arouse devotion” and “a personal appeal that enables you to influence others.” Other definitions describe it as “a gift, the ability to charm or influence people” and “attractiveness, magnetism, presence, and leadership ability.” Dr. Tony Alessandra defines charisma as “the ability to positively influence others by connecting with them physically, emotionally, and intellectually.” Harvard anthropologist Charles Lindholm defines it as “above all, a relationship, a mutual blend of the inner self of leader and follower.”
Charisma certainly has several key components, and Dr. Alessandra chose to summarize them as intellectual, physical, and emotional. Intellectual charisma is often characterized by an impressive vocabulary and the ability to extract the best and most thoughtful ideas from others. A cultured person with an impressive and resonant speaking style is generally associated with being very charismatic. An extremely well-educated but not arrogant person could also be considered charismatic. Leadership skills are often associated with charisma.
Physical charisma is often evident simply by commanding presence and impressive physical stature. It can also be embellished by the relative attractiveness of that person, be it male or female. A great handshake, a confident, articulate voice, and positive eye contact that conveys “I’m interested in learning more about you and I respect you immensely” are all ways to convey charisma. Great posture, proximity, and even wardrobe add to a person’s charismatic quotient.
Emotional charisma is conveyed by the feeling of being a deep thinker or someone who is willing to reflect on the big picture. These people have a tendency to bring out the best in the rest of us by causing us to dig deep emotionally and seek better answers to life’s challenges. They see more in us than we sometimes see in ourselves. They are both motivating and engaging people.
Charismatic people have a “gleam” or “gleam” in their eyes. You know what I mean. They have the essence of a positive and energizing thought form and can immediately transfer that feeling to others. These traits allow the charismatic person to easily connect with others. A charismatic person will light up a room simply by walking into it. We have all experienced this feeling when we have personally witnessed the change of mood or emotional intensity in a room simply by the presence of an individual who has just entered.
A great example of a well-known charismatic person is former President Bill Clinton. Whether or not you agree with his politics or antics, most people would agree that he could arguably be one of the most charismatic leaders of our time. Why? Was he always correct? Did he have the full support of Congress or the American people? Did the other world leaders always see things their way? Was it flawless? Of course it wasn’t. It was never any of those things.
What President Clinton has is an amazing ability to persuade people of his point of view. You have the ability to connect with people at all levels by being sincerely interested in them. His influence on others is profound. He has an imposing physical presence, but maintains a youthful charm. He is extremely intelligent and cultured. It’s articulate but not condescending. Many would describe him as handsome. He has owned and experienced the power of the Presidency of the United States. He also has that “gleam” in his eyes. The man has great charisma!
Can you be charismatic like President Clinton? You certainly can. You already have some charisma, certain strengths and abilities that others find attractive. Develop these. Look people in the eye. Listen carefully when you are talking. Show genuine interest in their point of view. Be quick to forgive minor mistakes, and issue courteous gratitude and compliments when appropriate. You may not be able to do anything about your physical height, but you can still have a commanding presence through your confidence level, your posture, your voice, and your eye contact.
Charism is not simply a gift from God that was bestowed on some people, but on everyone. You have some charisma, like President Clinton. Determine your strengths and build on them first. Point to other areas where you would like to grow and be busy. Making the effort to further develop your charisma is truly rewarding and will surely pay you back handsomely.