Extramarital activity is at an all time high these days. Spouses have physical flings with coworkers, people they meet online, and reconnect with old lovers far too often. Infidelity statistics suggest that as many as 80% of marriages have a spouse who has had or will engage in extramarital activities at least once during the course of their marriage. If you factor in non-sexual relationships, surveys suggest this statistic is as high as 90%. With these things in mind, how can you tell if your spouse is cheating on you?
Trust your gut In many cases, you must trust your gut. You may not see any signs that your spouse is cheating on you, but if deep down you have this sick feeling in the pit of your stomach, this is something you should listen to. It could be the air around them, the way they carry themselves, subtle changes in their attitude, or just a feeling that they are different in some way. Don’t ignore your inner instincts, as studies suggest they are right most of the time. Pay attention to his behavior.
Behavior changes are one of the most frequent signs that are shown when someone starts an extramarital relationship. They may become moody, indifferent, overly affectionate, sarcastic, or critical. Because people react differently in different scenarios, there is no single behavioral characteristic that means your spouse is cheating on you. However, what is common is that your spouse’s behavior changes in one way or another. If they haven’t been acting like themselves recently, especially if there are other signs of cheating, this is something you should definitely look out for.
Pay attention to their activities If your spouse is cheating on you, it is likely that their activities or schedule have changed. For example, they may suddenly become interested in fitness, they may start running errands at all hours of the day or night, or they may start putting in extra hours at work. Whichever the case, the end result is usually the same: they spend less time with you and more time somewhere else.
Now, it’s important to understand that just because your spouse is showing signs that they might be cheating on you, it doesn’t mean that they are. Also, even if his instincts tell you that they are involved in some kind of extramarital activity, that doesn’t necessarily mean that they are. People go through changes, people have bad attitudes, and sometimes life just throws you a curveball and when mixed with other factors in your life, you can behave in unexpected ways. In other words, it’s probably not a good idea to confront your spouse about cheating unless he has real proof that he is, in fact, involved with someone else.
If you think your spouse is cheating on you, listen to your gut and pay attention. If you still can’t shake the feeling that something isn’t right, hire a private investigator or use some type of forensic services to dig a little deeper into the situation. While the feelings associated with thinking your spouse may be cheating on you are terrible, to put it lightly, potentially ruining your relationship because you couldn’t get real proof of infidelity before confronting your spouse is not something you want to put up with.
Copyright (c) 2009 Ed Opperman