Women often complain that their husbands spend most of their time away from home. They spend most of their time out with friends or visiting their parents. On the other hand, husbands complain that wives are always busy with children and don’t care about their husbands.
Let us see what the Word of God says on such a subject:
1. Your Friend is your equal
We find details of the friendship between husband and wife and that they are the same in Genesis 2:15-25. God gave man the responsibility of cultivating and caring for the land. He took care of the animals and named them. But among the animals there was none that was fit for the company of man. The man wanted an equal. He needed someone to be by his side, not someone he would rule over. That’s according to Genesis 2:20, which says, “The man gave names to all the domestic animals, to all the birds of the air, and to all the wild animals. He saw many animals and birds, but he could not find them.” a partner who was right for him.”
So God made a wife for the man. She was equal to the man and therefore she could be his friend. She was part of him. The man did not lord it over her. His man and his wife worked together and became one flesh according to Genesis 2:24. There was nothing hidden between them. They trusted each other perfectly. As a result, they were not ashamed to be together according to Genesis 2:25, which says: “The man and his wife were naked, but they were not ashamed.” Adam and Eve were best friends. God intended marriage to be that way. Husband and wife must completely trust each other. They must reveal and share their thoughts and bodies. No one should rule the other. They should help and support each other. God’s desire was for husband and wife to be each other’s best friends. That is the purpose of marriage.
2. Your spouse should be closer to you than either of your parents.
Let’s look at these scriptures; Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:5 and Ephesians 5:31:
Gen 2:24 Therefore a man leaves his father and mother and cleaves to his wife. In this way two people become one.
Mat 19:5 And God said, Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother, and be united to his wife. And the two people will become one.
Eph 5:31 The Scriptures say, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two shall become one.”
The husband brought his bride to his parents’ house when they were married during the time the Bible was written. This is what is practiced in many areas of Africa as a custom. However, God is saying that the husband must also leave his father and his mother when he marries. Families should not interfere in marriage. When a husband has to choose between his wife and his parents, it must be for his wife according to Ephesians 5: 31-33:
Eph 5:31 The Scriptures say, “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two shall become one.”
Eph 5:32 That secret truth is very important: I mean Christ and the church.
Eph 5:33 But each of you must love his wife as he loves himself. And a wife should respect her husband.
Now they are one. They both have to honor their parents and listen to their advice. The two are now close friends.
3. Marriage is more important than your children
In the scriptures that we read in the previous point, we do not read anything about children. This shows that the marriage is complete in God’s sight, even if there are no children. It is people who link the issue of children to validate a marriage, especially sons. However, according to the Word, children are an additional gift and blessing for parents. Marriage is the foundation for taking full responsibility for your children. If a husband must choose between his wife and his children, his wife must come first. The same applies to the wife, her husband must come first. It is necessary to establish a proper foundation. Children must know that their parents are one. Otherwise, an incorrect foundation will crack.
4. One husband, one wife
Genesis 2:24 does not speak of wives. God made a wife for Adam. Even today God is speaking of a husband and a wife for each other according to Malachi 2:15. It says, “God wants husbands and wives to become one body and one spirit. Why? To have holy children and protect that spiritual unity. Don’t cheat on your wife. She has been your wife since you were young.” The first man to have more than one wife in the Bible is Lameck according to Genesis 4:19-24. We are told that he was a wicked man. Now, you can give yourself completely in love to only one person. Between lovers, no one can tolerate rivals just as God cannot tolerate it with His people according to Exodus 20:5, which says: “Do not worship or serve idols of any kind, for I, the LORD, am your God. they hate my people who worship other gods. Those who sin against me become my enemies, and I will punish them. And I will punish your children, your grandchildren and even your great-grandchildren.” There is no place for the second person in the heart of a man or a woman. Marriage is the most important relationship on earth between two people. This relationship is resembles the relationship between Christ and the church according to Ephesians 5:24-32. As God loves His people, so should the husband love his wife. As the church gives herself to Christ, so the wife should give herself to her husband.
We have learned that one of the purposes of marriage was for the man to have a partner. That is a friend who is his equal. What that means is that the woman must be suitable for the husband. Husband and wife must be friends. The two become one flesh. No other human relationship should replace that of husband and wife. So strive for unity with your spouse. If you need advice on relationship issues, you can contact me.