If you were to ask a thousand women what kind of guy they are looking for, most would tell you: a good guy who treats them well. But is this really the truth? What exactly does it mean when a woman says “I just want a good guy”?
Most guys who are not successful with women are good guys. And there’s really nothing wrong with being nice. It is a very positive quality. However, being too nice won’t help you get the girls you really want.
First, let’s tackle a problem that most men have a hard time understanding.
When a woman tells you she wants a nice guy, she probably won’t have the same definition of the word as you do. She really is looking for a nice guy, but guys who try to be nice often misunderstand what she means by that. The problem is that they act like complete cowards around her doing everything they can to please her. A woman looking for a “nice guy” is definitely not asking to be put on a pedestal.
How many times have you heard a guy say this: “If she was with me, I would do everything for her! I would treat her right, not like (the guys she always dates)”? Now don’t get me wrong. Women are wonderful and all, but they’re also human beings and they don’t really want you to worship them, treat them “nice” or do everything for them. When you put a girl on a pedestal, you are telling her that she is worth much more than you. And if you think she would like that, think again; No woman wants that!
The truth is that if you take a closer look at what is really going on, you will realize that there is a logical pattern behind their behavior. A woman doesn’t need a man who is desperately trying to do everything for her; she needs a man who is in control of her own emotions and who can support her when she feels vulnerable. She needs a person that she can trust and that she can count on when needed. That is why you cannot afford to be the one who brings less value to the relationship.
If you get rid of the thought that a woman is someone like a goddess and start facing the reality that she is just a normal human being, you will start treating her that way. And isn’t this a feeling of relief?
So now that we’ve cleared this up, let’s tackle a much bigger problem.
Nice guys nowadays firmly believe that women are only attracted to jerks. Many good guys even go as far as blaming them for it. Sure, there are some girls who are attracted to jerks, but blaming them for it is just unacceptable! No woman in her right mind wants a jerk who will physically and mentally abuse her. The only reason these women find jerks attractive is because he conveys some alpha male characteristics, traits that the nice guy completely lacks (this is also a reason women prefer jerks to nice guys). ).
If nice guys would stop blaming women, look at what the jerk does right, and take some responsibility by starting to improve their own situations, they would instantly become more attractive to the opposite sex.