Dating successfully is all about having good communication skills. The better you can communicate with the women you are attracted to, the better you can attract them!
And few methods of communication are as important as talking on the phone.
After you start seeing someone regularly and seeing them face to face, your main method of maintaining the relationship is using the PHONE.
Without talking to someone on the phone, it will be difficult to create the kind of rapport necessary to sustain a relationship.
So having good phone skills is VITAL for success with women!
I speak from experience, that your presence on the phone can RUIN YOU or make you seem so confident, mysterious and funny that she can’t WAIT to go out with you.
Here’s what you need to know to make a great impression on the phone and keep their interest in you…
1.) Don’t be nervous on the phone!
If you’re nervous talking on the phone, that will cause you to let the conversation stall. She’ll be able to tell if you’re having a hard time making conversation and it will hurt her impression of you.
The key here is to NOT BE NERVOUS when you call a girl! If you feel nervous before calling, take some time and calm down. Take a deep breath, listen to some relaxing music, and remember that there are plenty of other girls out there if it doesn’t work out with this one.
It is important to project the right attitude while using the phone. Being (and sounding) confident will always trump nervousness! So allow yourself to have fun and relax!
2.) Be ASSERTIVE when you speak!
Most people MUMBLING and TRUMBLING over themselves with crap like, “What have you been up to?” Nothing bores a girl more than these boring and uncomfortable questions.
If you trust the girl to lead the conversation, you will find that the conversation will end quickly.
You have to be assertive in the conversation and direct it where you want it to go. DO NOT trust her to carry this load!
Have a few things you’d like to talk about before you call. This will give you an idea of what to talk about if the conversation stalls. If he mentions something that interests you while you’re talking, ask him in more detail.
Be active in making the conversation!
3.) Don’t call for no reason.
Calling just to chat is a waste of time for both of you. Sure, talking to a girl should be fun, but you should always have a MOTIVE or REASON to call a girl.
Why is this important? You don’t want her to think that she will have to chat for 2 hours every time you decide to call her.
Know what you want to accomplish with the phone call before you start dialing! Is it to make an appointment? Is it to touch base? Is it to strengthen your report?
Having a reason to call her will help you stay focused on your ultimate goal.
4.) Don’t ask, instead INVITE!
When talking to a girl, the urgency is to give her the final decision on what to do.
Saying something like “Are you busy on Friday?” It may sound reasonable to you, but you’re still putting the burden on her to find the time to hang out with you!
Anytime you push a girl over the phone to meet you, you want to frame things as inviting her to join you, rather than her choosing how to meet you.
And trust me, THERE IS a difference!
Say “Would you like to hang out tomorrow night?” is a lot different than “I’m going to this really awesome bar tomorrow night to see an amazing band, would you like to come?”
Offering the girl you’re talking to opportunities will motivate her to say “yes” more than asking her if she’d be up for spending time with you.
5.) Be congruent with who you are!
When we talk on the phone, an issue arises where we are different people than we normally are. Maybe we’re a little more outgoing, attractive, fun, or whatever.
Keep in mind that for a date to be successful, you need to be CONSISTENT about who you are so that the girl can really get to know you.
Don’t try to be someone you’re not on the phone. The fact that you are not face to face does not give you room to lie or misrepresent yourself. The more true you are about who you are and what you are like, the greater your chance of success.
Talking on the phone is an unfortunate but necessary part of dating. Most men don’t like it, but if you can learn to do it better, you’ll find that many women will be much more open to meeting you than usual.