I called a guy I’ve known for about three years.
Along with his wife, he has been to several parties at my house and we have been very great.

He’s a professional actor, which for me was a partially traveled path, so I kind of enjoy hearing about his career, how he deals with his challenges, like rejection and the inevitable ups and downs.

And I guess I’ve always said to myself, “I can do what he does, whenever I want.”
And someday, I can do that.
In the meantime, there are very few links between his field and mine, although I do perform at lectures and seminars, and make a considerable number of television appearances.

Finally, the day came when I needed some advice from him on where I could take my media career.
I called him and he didn’t seem particularly busy.
What surprised me was the ease with which he dismissed the subject of my query and turned the tables.
He said, without a trace of regret or reluctance, “I can’t help you, but if there’s anything you can do for me, don’t hesitate to call me!”

That put me off a bit, but I called it “show business.” It could be one of those people you know who are superficially friendly, as long as you can help them, but if you can’t, the conversation is over.

Then I got a call from a long-lost business associate from the rural Midwest, a salt-of-the-earth guy and someone I remember as a good guy. After catching up, I mentioned that his seminar sponsorship might come in handy one of these days when he gets back to his neck of the woods, but he just balked.

Almost in the next sentence, he told me that he has some great new financial products to offer and that I should discuss them with him.
I hung up the phone and just shook my head.
What happened to the idea of ​​reciprocity? One hand washes the other, right?
I’ve always had the mindset of believing, “If you want value, give value back,” especially in business.

This is a proven idea in friendship, that is, Do you want a friend? Be a friend.
But this ethic of reciprocity could be changing.
If so, that’s very disappointing, and I think silly, because win-lose relationships don’t last long, no matter where we’re located or what business we’re in.

There’s no need to keep an official record of favors received and returned, but it seems a lot more sensible than acting as if career advancement is a one-way street.

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